And a New Writer
My approach to these types of events is to feel the pain, and let the emotion come naturally; but to also allow yourself to become free from the stressors we have no control over.
As for events where we bare more of a responsibility to, my approach is introspection and perspective.
Working with parents and youth who live in extreme poverty has given me a different perspective on life’s issues than I used to have. I used to be the person that would dwell on these situations, and let them constantly bring my spirits down. Seeing an individual with no home, no money, and their children apprehended is able to smile and laugh hit me deeper than seeing the negative aspects of all these situations.
Perhaps at times individuals over-think problems; perhaps all we need is perspective.
For individuals seeking advice, I want to provide a new perspective on the situation and allow them to see these interpersonal problems in a new light. I want the individual to have an open and unbiased dialect on the situation with themselves and try and show them how they could have handled the stress/situation in a different way.
As stated by Aristotle, “It is the mark of an educated mind, to entertain a thought without accepting it.” I’ve always found that even with the most extreme negatives, there is always a silver lining. I intend to show the individual how they can mend these emotional scars of the situation that has been bestowed upon them.
As an individual, I have been through many stressful events and I am not afraid to share my stories with the world. I was a child of divorce which led to a sibling dealing with drug addiction, an individual who was sexually harassed, and a lover who has been cheated on. I always tend to over-think situations and these events used to harass my state of mind for many years.
One day, I changed my perspective. Instead of dwelling on how badly I was hurt in these situations, I looked at how it made me grow as a person. Though these circumstances are something individuals ought to avoid, some are inevitable and out of one’s control. One example is being cheated on; the further away I get from the event the more clarity I have on the situation and how wrong this girl actually was for me. Sometimes it takes something completely out of our hands to provide us with this perspective. Though it took me a long time to finally get over the situation, I have changed for the better. I have found someone who accents me perfectly and has changed the way I view trust entirely, but also changed the way I act in a relationship.
A big key in being able to see the silver lining is being honest with ourselves unafraid of the physical and emotional restraints we have on ourselves. Individuals must constantly learn and grow from every person and moment we encounter; there are always lessons to be learned, we just need to be aware of them.